Six magic phrases to get your children to listen to you
These phrases might just help the next time your child has a meltdown.
We know that when it comes to parenting, it's never one-size-fits-all. Parenting is hard, and sometimes a little advice isn't a bad thing.
One of the biggest struggles parents face is getting their children to listen, and many parents are constantly trying new ways to make that happen.
According to mom and certified Conscious Parenting Coach, Reem Raouda, there are six "magic phrases" parents can use to help their children truly hear them.
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Raouda, who is a mother herself, has studied more than 200 parent–child relationships and shared her advice on CNBC.
From her research, she has learned that children listen best when they feel connected and emotionally safe.
This means they feel respected but also free to share what they are experiencing.
So, here are six magic phrases that could help your child feel safe and, in turn, make them more likely to listen to you:
Disclaimer: Parenting looks different for everyone. This is only meant as advice that may be helpful.
1. "I believe you."
When kids feel doubted, they put their guard up and move into self-protection. Choosing belief lowers shame and builds safety, which makes it possible for them to actually hear you.
2. "Let's figure this out together."
Screaming orders often create a standoff. Involving kids in problem-solving makes them more invested in the outcome, while still holding boundaries and avoiding power struggles.
3. "You can feel this. I'm right here."
When emotions run high, kids can’t process logic, they need help calming their nervous system. This phrase validates their feelings and reassures them that they’re not alone, helping them reset.
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4. "I'm listening. Tell me what's going on."
Kids need to feel heard before they can listen in return. Giving attention first dissolves resistance, surfaces the real issue, and opens space for connection and repair.
5. "I hear you. I'm on your side."
Conflicts escalate when kids feel misunderstood or opposed. Positioning yourself as an ally lowers defences, shifts the dynamic, and creates room for cooperative problem-solving.
6. "I've got you, no matter what."
Shame often follows mistakes. This phrase reminds kids that love and support aren't conditional, encouraging accountability without fear-based compliance.
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