Dear Man, know when 'no' means 'no' #MBDMANifesto
What is it about men and understanding that 'no' means 'no'? I realise that not all men are like this, however, given the reaction from so many women including me over how our bodies are so often policed, I would say it's time for bold declarations to be made. Here is my #MBDMANifesto.
Dear Man
If you are the man that cat calls a woman when she walks down the street then this is for you. If you are the man who gets respect from a woman through fear, then this is for you. If you are a man who needs to make a woman aware that you are a man, then this is for you.
Someone might have told you that a woman likes it when you whistle at her on the side of the road. Or maybe that if she doesn't respond to your revolting charm, that you have the right to say what ever you want to her. Well that someone lied. I call the charm revolting because that is what it is. It doesnt make her feel like she is beautiful. No, it makes her feel cheap. It doesnt make you seem manly, No. It makes you seem like a coward. See, when you are trying to get a woman's attention. Then it shouldn't be about you.
Has it ever crossed your mind that she might not want you. That she won't be interested, that she actually has a choice in the matter and she is allowed to have one.
Have you ever thought that she has a husband or a boyfriend a wife or a girlfriend and she is really not interested in you? Have you ever thought that she is having a tough day, something might have happened that day that she needs to cope with?
If you haven't, then please do realise that you are selfish and insecure.
If you have to prove to me that you are a man by treating me like an object made to satisfy you, then you obviously aren't convinced of your manhood yourself.
You don't get to have the power to degrade me and make me feel like garbage, and be called a real man. You don't get to make me fear walking down the street due to the fact that you are physically stronger than me.Somebody to prey so that you can get called a real man.
When you act like that you are not a real man.
You are insecure. It's ok to be insecure sometimes because there is a lot of pressure on us to always perform. But, you don't get to see a reflection of your own insecurities in the woman in front of you and then treat her like you think you deserve to be treated. No. You should see a woman for what she’s worth and treat her according to that, because it's not about you.
I am asking you to please honour and respect women. I am asking you to treat her like you would your mother. I am asking you to put yourself in her shoes. I am asking you practise introspection and realise that it’s not what you reflect on the outside that makes you a real man, it's that which lives on the inside. And if what lives within you is troubled, then be a man and ask for help.
Love, from a woman that knows her worth.
Share your #MBDMANifesto with us.